A Woman Jesus Can Teach…
A few months ago I found this book at a thrift store, and today I felt a strong pull to open it and read it… sort of thinking Jesus saw my enthusiasm for when I’m teaching the kids at church and wants me to have the same feelings about HIM teaching ME.
So I read the first chapter and got to the reflection questions, and they really hit me.
You see, the past couple of days, the enemy has been attacking me HARD. Last night I spent the entire night in nonstop nightmares… all of them just sick, twisted, replays of the worst moments of my life. It was truly awful and I’ve spent much of today feeling a bit down. I questioned if I am even good enough or ready to serve in ministry.
It took reading the chapter to knock some darn sense in me.
You see, being a disciple of Christ means you have to give up your life. All of it. Lay it down and walk away from it as you walk onto the path you’re called on.
I thought I had fully understood what that meant. But in my quiet moments of reading, I realized the part that I somehow missed…
We aren’t called to just lay down parts of our life, we are called to lay down ALL of our life… apparently I forgot the definition of ALL… it was like a smack in the head to realize that meant the past too.
Colossians 3:3–5 says “For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory. Put to death therefore what is earthly in you: sexual immorality, impurity, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry.”
I’ve already put those to death. But I haven’t put my guilt or shame to death. I keep trying to, but it keeps sneaking up on me (like today). And I think it’s because, well, I’m human. And it’s sometimes hard for me to fathom a God who says “I forgive you and I love you and you are redeemed… now follow me”.
But if you continue reading that passage, verse 15 says “And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful”
I’ve struggled to let go of things. And holding them in has blocked peace for me. The enemy knows that and likes to remind me how little I deserve peace. But the moment I asked forgiveness, promised repentance and put all those sinful things to death, and decided to walk with Christ, that was the moment that ALL of that life was put to death and I was given a new life.
In this life, I AM good enough. I AM ready to serve. I won’t let the enemy continue to batter me with my past, because I am not that person anymore! I am already redeemed.
Now, I am “A Woman Jesus Can Teach”.
